im just a 14 yr old gurrl who is g8 w that textin language

spoomne:

✌ LAUGH BEC IM COOL 

(Source: sadbreasts, via human)

Notes
112214
Posted
27 seconds ago

filthycalum:

mashocake:

5sostrum:

parudise:

I JUST SAW THIS ON TWITTER AND IM DYING OF LAUGHTER I CANT

'DO YOU OWN LESBIAN PORN?'

HAHAHAHHAHA THIS MADE MY DAY

“VAGINAL EXCRETER”

(via firepokemon)

Notes
69261
Posted
19 minutes ago
Anonymous asked: you look fucking stupid in a dress, DUDE


Answer:

dajo42:

image

come closer one second

image

little closer

image

okay close enough

image

i have a simple question: which of us is wearing a crown?

image

that would be me.

image

do you know what this crown means?

image

it means i look fucking cute

image

and you’re the human embodiment of a sore butt

image

now as your fucking queen, i royally declare

image

that i am beautiful and you are a listerine enema

Notes
153152
Posted
15 hours ago

tayloriaa:

I eat a lot for someone who’s terrified of gaining weight.

(via perks-of-being-chinese)

Notes
24925
Posted
16 hours ago

dekutrickortreet:

telapathetic:

when u haven’t masturbated in ages and

image

damn imma stop masturbating for a while so i can grow cannons on my back and launch torrents of water at people

(Source: telapathetic, via perks-of-being-chinese)

Notes
208200
Posted
18 hours ago

wizkawreath:

nnordor:

wizkawreath:

obama means family

no it doesnt

obama means nobody gets left behind

(Source: hashbrovvn, via perks-of-being-chinese)

Notes
238075
Posted
19 hours ago

How the Logic of "Friendzoning" Would Work If Applied in Other Instances:

*Man walks into a store and finds employee*
Man:Alright, I've had enough. Why haven't you guys hired me?!
Employee:Uh...well sir, when did you put in your application?
Man:I never filled out an application.
Employee:Well sir, we can't consider you for employment if you've never filled out an application.
Man:No, that's bullshit, because I've been coming here for years now, and every single time I tell you all how much I love this store and how much I appreciate your customer service, unlike some of your other customers might I add!
Employee:Well, but that doesn't-
Man:AND I even told you that I didn't have a job!
Employee:But sir, that doesn't indicate to us that you would like a job at our store. And again, if you've never filled out an application, we can't consider you. Besides, we're not hiring.
Man:OH! Not hiring, HA! What a laugh. I see your store go through seasonal workers all the time. They come and go like nothing, but you won't consider me as a part-time employee even though I KNOW you've been looking for workers to fill positions? That's insane!
Employee:Sir, we've been looking to hire a few people for management positions. Do you have any management experience?
Man:Well no, but what does that matter?
Employee:...Well sir, that's what we're looking for. You won't be suitable for the position without management experience.
Man:Oh that's such a load of crap. You know, you'll be waiting around a long time for a manager if you don't lower your standards a little. Who cares if someone knows how to manage a store? I LOVE this store and I'm willing to work here, that's all that should matter to you.
Employee:That...doesn't make any sense.
Man:NO! I'm done. This is over. From now on, no more Mr. Nice Guy.
Employee:
Man:
Employee:
Man:Fuck you, slut.
Notes
285266
Posted
20 hours ago

snatch-comix:

imparalyzedbyitt:

do people think this is like really romantic or something he can’t hold her because he has fucking scissors for hands

no people think it’s really fucking sad ‘cause he loves her and cant hold her because he has SCISSORS FOR HANDS

(Source: patrickmasturbateman, via parkingstrange)

Notes
306179
Posted
21 hours ago
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